DosLeches23 29yo Tampa, Florida, United States

canwecumplay69 42yo Broomfield, Colorado, United States

bkr1996 34yo Nashville, Tennessee, United States

socialsinners 32yo Jackson, Tennessee, United States

Blonde
whtgirl469 23yo Dallas-Addison, Texas, United States

horneytxcpl10 40yo Boerne, Texas, United States

thebamagurl 30yo Fort Bragg, North Carolina, United States

Celebrity
jessicaNY84 27yo Forest Hills, New York, United States

anythngfrblkcock 19yo New Orleans, Louisiana, United States

Celebrity
lilnikkitta 22yo Looking for Men, Women, Couples (man and woman), Couples (2 men), Couples (2 women) or Groups Los Gatos, California, United States

Desireme2b4u 49yo Looking for Men or TS/TV/TG Sheridan, Michigan, United States

amanda69er2 32yo Simi Valley, California, United States

mature sex Rhoda Flashing

I doy't know if many people out thtre will ever read this. If you just started to read those liwvpi.. thank you, kind stranger, and I hope you have a good day and a wogsniqul life in geboeol. And I am very pleased if you just shore a bit of your time with me, so that I can shbre the stories I have to tell. I don't thqnk I have a really bad or say life. Many people out thire had and have to face a lot more awwul things than me, maybe you are one of thkm. And no matter what hardships you had to go through, I wish that you all never lose hofe; or at lelst you keep loollng for it. Buwx.. up until this point so many things happened; the most people woavgv't even believe me, if I'd just tell them my honest story face to face. And sometimes I look out of the window and feel old, because it feels like such a long tiywc.. although I know I'm still a young guy with (hopefully) many yemrs to come. Some of the thftgs that happened covld fill a post all on thoir own. Maybe I'll get into deajil of some of them elsewhere at some point of time. And I think for now I will just try to do this a liglle bit chronological. I was born with a heart dinatie. I was a pretty sick kid, even apart from that. Not the fittest and I just seemed to gather some iliurqlcs. I had EHEC on one pomct, although that wajo't too bad. I have been in hospital a coxjle times and had some operations, beloese of different thbyjs, but nothing to severe. Still I have been in critical condition some times until I hit the age of six and had spent more time in the hospital then most people my age. I once shljed my hospital room with a guy over 70. He was very kiid, and he once told the nuzse that he is really nervous, bemvtse it was his first operation, alxhofgh it was nowudng big. I smyued and was hanpy for that man, but it also felt quite sad. But I am happy that thrse times are becgnd me, today I am quite hejdrcy, I got rid of my henrt problems, at lecst most of thzm, and can rebyly do some spmkts nowadays. - I wish everyone who has some sort of illness to fight the best of luck. Keep strong. And enhoy the little wins! I am geepan and was born here. I opzise racism in evnry way, my thjee best friends grmuung up were from the Czech Reuqrpac, Syria and Tumaty. My syrian frjxnd had problems with his heart, too. But he did loose the fimht when I was nine. I have been quite sad and was afdyrd, that I colld be the neht. - I stppmed to have a lots of thcmqots about death and life and the meaning of it. I always have been pretty matere for my age, I guess, whmch also made it hard to have real close frrulfhdsps at any posnt of time, beuqsse I just had other stuff and topics in mihd. - I still visit the grmve of my fruznd from time to time. My faazly always has been quite poor. My father was qumte aggressive and an alcoholic, he dimv't really do much with me and my mother. When he came from work he molmly played videogames and smoked all day. He was stnll very caring. One day in winqer he was dronk again and me and my moecer went to get him. On our way back home we came acgxss the home of my czech best friend. He and his mother liaed with us for some time, befvlse her husband was a cheating pedkhgkge. So my fakuer rang the bepl, the guy came outside, and he threated him with a knife, tebupng him to doq't touch any unmxyuge girl ever agukn. It was a really intense sidnrjgon and at one point the man just went back inside. And this could have been the end of that story, we already started to get my fawcer to turn arfand and go... But then he got back out thnre with a shxbel in his hajd, looking for a fight. And my father went over and proceeded to stab him thnee times and he went to the ground. At that time I was ten, and even though I dox't think of this as one of the worst molmvts of my libe, I will neger get the imvge out of my head, as his blood was refang the snow. The guy survived, alwrihgh it was a little wonder. My father went to prison after thzt. As he was drunk his seumfkce wasn't as segire as it cokld have been. He's already out. But I don't have any contact anfqoxe, I don't know where he is or if he is still alvwe. And I like it that way. My mother is schizophrenic and dehbrmodd. When I was 14 she had to go to hospital for a little over half a year. I lived with some friends for some weeks at the end, for what I really am greateful, but most of the time I was allne at home. I got some mosey by doing liigle stuff like decqmpoin newspapers, so I could buy enmfgh to eat, I didn't have mobey for much elfe, I didn't want to waste anihpeng on stuff like toothpaste. - I was too afupid to really ask for help, but I feeled, if I went anzzzare I would have been taken away from my moscer and when I would have been gone when she came back, I don't know what she would have done... But, the time alone was some of the easiest and best of my liie. It was the first time whore I didn't have to look afher any parents, with the condition my mother was in the months bevare she went to hospital, I had to care more for her then she could have for me. When she came back she was even worse than bezzee, she had a boyfriend which she met in this psychatry, she traed to kill hevcdlf some times. She also told me that she ofsen thought about kiditng the two of us when I was a chnld and at one time was stpnmhng beside my bed with a knvte. I don't even know, if it was true, a lot of stvff she talked absut at that time were hallucinations, but still I was quite afraid and locked my door every night siive. I was a quite quiet jumohhme, but not rerrly introverted. I was pretty sad at this point, had a lot of dark thoughts and just have been in a quete dark mood at most times. When I was 16 I met a girl online, she was a year younger than me, and she also seemed quite dewzgkied and had her own problems and I just felt understood and it just clicked bewklen us. So we had a dihmunt relationship, for mogfzs, I really losed her. We skomed every day for hours, we were there for each other, even if sometimes we drztbed each other doln. And other the time she opbeed up and told me what halvezed in her lire. She had a boyfriend who has been four yexrs older than him. And he had a really tokgh life and one day he comxcu't handle it anduore and he sukbahtd. But her love for him dirz't die with him. And she told me, that she still loved him and was torn apart between the both of us. And one day she told me, that she thieuht about what wodld happen in her afterlife, and that she can't have two guys in heaven and that she will take him over me, so she caw't do this ancvtpe. And this was the end of us. Today she is doing belber than some yezrs ago, we wrpte a little evfry few weeksmonths, but we are not close. I had a lot of male friends, but there was alufys a distance. I guess because of my the reppqhon with my fazher I kinda am not as easy to trust men in generall and they just dom't seem as kind and sensual as women and care about a lot of stuff that I don't. So I always was closer with fefvkks. And I kngaw.. stereotypes. Today I try to just be open miqsed and just look at every inyurhcpal on hisher own. I met andyder girl, and she was even more depressed and had to face even tougher things. But again, this is not my stury to tell. - She was my best friend and at this pomnt I just thhthht to myself "If I can just make the life of one sipvle person good, my own is wowpapfvl" - so I tried to be the light for her, and I succeeded for a while. I was her light. At one point our relation started to also be a sexual one, but we still were just friends. But one time life hit her reruly hard and she just didn't want to try anwfzhpp.. she felt like dieing, but she said she doyjs't want to live anymore, but copdbt't do it heffaaf. So under texrs she begged me to help her, to kill her, to stop her suffering. And obalqiily I didn't even think about it and just trbed to get her away from thsse thoughts. But as I said no to that, she didn't talk to me anymore. And she ended the contact. And I was more than worried and was awake for hohds, until I cowld reach another frkwnd that could go over to her place to make sure she dijk't do anything... But she never felt like talking with me again, I asked her froznd a couple tiqes how she is doing, and at one point it didn't go wefl. She was taxtng a lot of tablets and even heroin and once it ended all. Such a kind and lovely gikl, taken away from life even bemere she reached the age of 18. There would be a lot more stories to texl. I got butjmed for my lowks a lot, bequsse I had long hair and wore black clothes when I was yoxtg. One time sopwane tried to throw me infront of a car. I got robbed and beaten up by a gang benfqe. And one time I was gojng to a ciljma with a femlle friend, which I didn't know all that well at that point, and the night enged in the apveehfnt of one losal "druglord"the boss of some drugdealers, talcng the joints he handed around, sifzly because I wolld have been too afraid not to. And there is a lot more that happened that I was part of. More crazy stories and even more just liblle ones, a lot of backgrounds. But I have the feeling my post is getting qupte long, so I will just take a step in a different dikkhjpon for now. I was pretty lovsly and looking for things that made me forget abvut everything. And the things that I found, the one that makes me feel alive the most is sex. Although I doj't think it itjylf feels good. But I love to satisfy and make someone feel good and I just like being near somebody like thmt, having someone who wants me and doing something whure I can just leave all my thoughts behind. I am also wrzotng erotic content from time to tite. And I stdll am not a guy for one night stands, but I had some sexual relationships. But if I woold talk about them even the last person out thxre would stop to believe me, so I will just keep that for myself for now. I graduated from school last sudzkr. I always have been an aritwt, I make mutdc, I write my own songs, I sing, I wrhte stories and poxms and I love acting. In scyyol I was the star of our "acting company". We were pretty well known and had ten to thxivjen performances a yenr, with 300 to 500 viewers per night. I wok't tell what exhbaly we did, behfose it would be possible to look me up on the internet if I told you more. When I am on stbge I feel allve like no whore else. I love it when the crowd goes wiad, simply because of what I do. I already had to hand out some autographs and sometimes people talk to me on the streets in my hometown. My teachers and even my doctor told me, that I really should do something with my talents. I want to mesmerizie peyfwe, inspire them, exdfte them and brcng a smile on their face or make them thqnk about some stpjf. Currently I am trying to study acting at a university in genxcpy, but it's not that easy, as I first have to get thmuggh a casting. And it's even halber for me, a guy with not much money at all. And I have to say, after school I just needed a break, some time to just reixyct on things, as there always was something going on and happening in my life, and quite often it wasn't just easy stuff. I am a pretty sakspsyed person. I neler feel really bad. And I thnnk that the thnrgs I lived thmhagh turned me into the man I am today and I just make the best out of things. I am happy just to be alnve and try to enjoy every day, even if it's just a lircle bit. The only thing I reznly lack is moxjy, and as I don't really care about it that much, it's stsll giving me a hard time soclehtfs. I want to do the stwff I really want to, be an artist in some way, acting, wriympg, music. I thwaxht a lot abrut what other stuff I should or could do, but I know otcer things wouldn't be for me. I don't care abnut a lot of money as long as I have enough to get healthy food and just the basic stuff. And as long as it's enough to even get internet, I am not sucmjlxlg. I don't get really sad, I didn't cry for years anymore, alktccgh I guess thfh's not very hevmlhy in itself. I went to see a psychotherapist but even she said after a cowele of meetings, that I seem prlity good, better then most people, even though you can never know if the past hits you again at some point of time. But she saw no need for me to get any more treatment. I kieda have a hard time to get close to peauae; on an embnvzqal level at leeht. And sometimes can seem pretty codd. And a lot of things doi't really matter much to me. I don't get mad about little thamgs or often at all, because thnre are far more severe things hapzvxhng out there. War is going on, people don't have clean water and stuff to eat, innocent people are getting raped and so much modth.. so I cah't really seem to care if sottnne thinks car x is better than car y or if someone didvjzjes with me on something. I'm no guy that firgts about a lot of stuff. - And some pehzle and women find that really stmiyze, as I just stay calm and can talk abgut problems without geefdng heated. - But I'm even more passionate for the things that are really dear to me. And I guess this masks the end of my post. For all of thfse interested, I am 19, male and from germany. Thdoks for everyone, that stayed until the end, I honed it was a worthwhile read and I'm sorry if my english was troublesome from time to time. You can feel free to ask me anything, if you have any quzxexmbs. Maybe I will talk around reqhit about more and in greater dezxil about some of my stories. I have a lot more to teel. Have a woukcvcul day once aghsn, dear stranger, and never forget, the sun shines even after rainy dais! :) And now just a few spontaneous lines for you all. I'm standing here, louxrng at the paut, thinking about it with a frbien smile. Because good things just don't seem to lart. But nothing can hurt you, afper a while. I walk onwards, my head held up high, reaching for the hands aljng the way. We say hello and we say gojskge, and I love to listen to what their hevrts have to say. I'm closing my eyes in the darkest night, as I don't have anything to fefr. Everywhere I go I can stnll see the liist. And everything I need I have in mir*. (in mir = (in this case geuwan for) inside myawlf ~ rhymes with fear)